It is hard to speak about Speak Up in the past tense, please excuse me if I trip along the way here in case I momentarily forget we are placing our beloved under 6-feet of code. I find myself mourning with relief as we accompany Speak Up in its final days, simply holding hands, quietly sitting by its bedside, focused on its slowing heartbeat.

It wasn’t long ago that Speak Up was an active teenager openly defying and challenging anything and anyone, slowly maturing into a more focused adult in search of a new voice, one that was less about being heard and more about being listened to. To all of this Armin spoke to yesterday, the evolution, the changes, the people, the challenges, the growth from child to teenager, from young adult to busy parent. With Brand New, Quipsologies, and most recently Word It by its side it seems Speak Up has raised its voice and its children, somewhat losing its voice along the way. There seems to come a point when one should better remain silent than go down the path of repetition, joining the senile in the same conversation day after day — Speak Up was rather terrified of joining the lot in Florida, card table by the pool to reminisce and re-converse.

Like with any loved one, saying good-bye is not easy. Speak Up has been a part of my life for the last seven years in a way only our daughter Maya has been able to surpass. Constantly talking about it, planning for what could happen next, what was said the day before, what the upcoming year could mean, where this and that could take a new life… over coffee, over lunch, at dinner, in the subway, walking in the park, in the dark, and during early dawn. It has mattered not when or where, but what. What can we do to make it better? What can we provide that is different? What…?

In the last few months the answers to these questions have become less encouraging as we realize how much ground Speak Up was able to cover during its tenure, and how much we have changed in this time. Going from frozen disgruntled Chicagoans that knew little about so many topics covered in the site, to the self-employed parents we are today. Much has happened in the process including relocations, blogs, websites, jobs, more jobs, incorporation, clients, three books, a child… I treasure the freedom that the sum of events has enabled me and my family, and I recognize that the process has been hard and full of small and large lessons, most if not all shaped by the life of Speak Up. For good or bad, one of the lessons acquired is the ability to recognize when one should let go.

And that day is here, a day where we will pull the code on Speak Up. A day in which we can begin to repeat ourselves as we remember its life as it happened, as we celebrate the challenges, the misses and the greatest hits (UPS!). A day where we can remember Speak Up for what it was, and not for what could have happened in Florida.

Good night my beloved. I shall miss you in life, and relive you in conversation.