FADE IN
A white rotary phone, sitting alone on a clear lucite table in a yawning, Kubrick-like white interior, rings. From the right are heard shuffled footsteps as SAUL BASS approaches, wearing a terrycloth bathrobe and slippers. He places his hand on the receiver tentatively, lets another ring vibrate through his fingertips, and picks it up.
[Saul Bass] “Hello?”
[Paul Rand] “SAULLLLLL!!”
[SB] “Yes?”
[PR] “It’s RAND, baby!”
[SB] (Pauses) “Are you?—is this the… Rand Corporation?”
[PR] “No man, PAUL Rand!”
[SB] “Oh, right. Paul Rand. Uh… Hello.”
[PR] “Yes, yes. Okay. Listen, Saul. I saw that new AT&T logo, and baby… like WOW… what’s up with that thing? Looks like one of those swirly Lifesaver lollipop things. The blueberry & cream one! Yummy!”
[SB] “New… AT&T logo?”
[PR] “Oh, yeah, man! It’s totally new! But it still LOOKS kind of like your old one… sort of.. (muffled laughter is heard) Anyway, you have broadband right? Go check it out! It’s all over the design blogs.”
[SB] “Okay, I don’t really know what you’re talking about, but I… I probably shouldn’t be using this phone.”
[PR] “Dude—you’re on DIALUP?! Sucks for you!”
[SB] “I’m… gonna hang up now.”
[PR] “Right, right. Okay, look. One quick thing; if you need a shoulder to cry on, my studio door is always open. You saw how they savaged my UPS logo, right? Wait for a brother to die, then they pounce. Assholes. You just know IBM is next. Anway, we old-school types gotta stick together. Am a I right or am I right?”
[SB] “Oh… UPS. That’s the one with the package? And the little bow?”
[PR] “Yeah… there was a bow. It was elegant minimalism with a touch of whimsy… Your point being?”
[SB] “Well, nothing, I’m just saying… the bow—”
[PR] “Bow, box, whatever—point is, it was mine, and I went and DIED and they fucked me. And now they’re fucking YOU!”
[SB] “How exactly?…”
[PR] “They dogged your LOGO man. Like I TOLD you! The swirly Lifesaver thing! HELLOOO!!!”
[SB] “I don’t know what ‘dogged’ means, but…”
[PR] “Look, now I have to go, but i was calling to invite you over. I was able to get my old drawing table, the ruling pens, ink, all that shit—don’t ask, man! I have my ways!—but i can totally hook you up. Deal?”
[SB] “Okay, sure. A ruling pen would be nice. Sorry, Paul, I’m still a little disoriented from the trip.”
[PR] “Hey, don’t sweat it. That FADES, man. You’ll be clear-headed in no time, and—trust me—TOTALLY pissed about the logo thing.”
[SB] “Okay, got it… Oh, one question… I have a computer here that says DELL on it… is that pretty typical?”
[PR] (pauses) “Dell? You sure?”
[SB] “D-E-L-L… yes, Dell. And (sniff), yes, it smells a little like… sulphur. Is that Publisher?”
FADE TO BLACK
well.
that was lame.
On Nov.26.2005 at 01:50 PM